In soccer (especially kids soccer) failure and quitting has become an expected rite of passage. The statistics are there for all to see and the soccer community is flooded with sob stories.
8 out of 10 kids will quit the game.
You hear that your chances of playing professionally are slim to none.
You hear that failure builds character.
Most optimists preach and advise, “fail and fail often. The more times you fail, the closer you get to success.” Just remember this quote for now and continue reading.
Kids soccer today is consumed with fear and failure is definitely in the air. You can’t help but breath it in.
My advice to you
Don’t Inhale!
Don’t be fooled by the status quo. Don’t buy into the stats. If other players quit, it has nothing to do with you. If other players don’t want to develop and play in the big leagues, it has nothing to do with you. If other players refuse to train, it has nothing to do with you. If other players fear the game, well, you get the point.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “you must learn from your mistakes.” A little too simplistic for me as I try and catch a fly between my chopsticks.
What do you really learn from your mistakes? Apart from the obvious, you might learn what not to do again. That’s a good start. If you make a mistake, struggle with fitness or you’ve failed to complete a drill, do you know how to correct these? The bottom line is this, if you’ve failed, do you know how to succeed?
Try the other end of the spectrum
How about learning from what works. Forget about “fail and fail often”. When something works, you can leverage this and do it again and again. If you find success and gains through a certain passing drill, do it again and the next time, you’ll probably do it even better.
Books, magazines and the so-called gurus that preach, “fail and fail often” need to remember that failure is not a prerequisite for success. Don’t look so surprised, how do you think nature works?
Think about this for a moment, EVOLUTION doesn’t stop for past failures. Just ask the dinosaurs. Evolution, survival of the fittest builds on what works. Don’t you think you should do the same?
“May the winds of destiny blow you to the stars”
I agree with most of what you say, but I’d like to just through an idea into the mix. The whole idea of “fail, and fail often” comes from doing things you don’t know if you can. If you never fail you’re never pushing past what you know capable of and that’s a BIG problem when trying to play in college, semi-pro, or pro.
No one in their right mind says to intentionally fail, but at the same time if you don’t fail you’re not trying to be better than what you currently are. Failure is part of becoming better regardless if you try to fail.
First and foremost, thanks for the comment Doug. “Fail and fail often” is open to interpretations and difference of opinions.
Replace “fail and fail often” with “extend yourself”, ” get out of your comfort zone”, “play with freedom and not with fear” are better slogans. Using the word fail is a dangerous exercise any way.
My posts are designed to raise eye brows and to identify questions that need to be answered. After reading my posts I would rather have you scratch your head then for you to simply agree.
How are you affiliated to soccer Doug? Do you have kids that play? Let me know and I’ll send them a gift.
Thomas